Of MM: Matchmaker 10

I shivered a bit as we stood outside the building that elegantly advertised "Madame Nicoleta".  We weren't in a bad section of Lowtown, but with how people had been reacting lately to Justice's radio show, you just never knew what kind of people would be roaming the streets at this time of night.  Riots had been known to break out over the most idiotic of things, though the area was quiet.

"Oooh, Ash, you have got to see this!  Isn't it pretty?"

Grinning at my friend's reaction to a shiny, I shook my head and rolled my eyes.  Stepping up beside her, I looked into the window of the jewelry store next door to the psychic's.

"You know… I should talk Anders into getting this for me.  Even though we made up so nicely, I think he still owes me from our fight," Maeve grinned.

"Go ahead.  Want me to talk him into it?" I asked, looking down at the bracelet she was pointing to.  It was gorgeous, the cuff made of beaten silver coins, with what looked to be mini jeweled bells of tourmaline, amethyst, aquamarine, and garnet attached.  There was something about how it looked that made me believe that when the little balls came together, a soft chime would sound.  It was exactly the sort of thing Maeve would go for.

"We'll have to come back tomorrow when the store is open so I can get a better look at it.  If I still like it then, then you can talk Anders into getting it for me."

"Deal," I laughed, tugging her toward the fortune teller's shop, wanting to get out from under the harsh glow of the street lamp.  Bells jingled as the door opened, signaling our arrival.

"Make yourself comfortable, my dears.  I shall be out with you in a moment," a voice rang out from the back, low and husky, with a bit of a Rivaini accent.  I looked over at Maeve and she shrugged, taking a seat at a table covered in a purple velvet cloth, different runes embroidered throughout in silver.  I grabbed the chair next to her and waited for the woman to actually appear.

"My apologies for the wait.  I was not expecting anyone so had not made myself ready," the woman stated, coming forward.  She definitely looked the part of a gypsy, her inky black hair flowing in a mass of curls to the small of her back, dusky skin enhanced by the deep red balloon pants and genie top she wore.  Her eyes were outlined with the blackest of kohl, highlighting her violet-blue eyes.

"You may call me Madame Nicoleta, if you wish," she continued on, winking at the two of us.  "While I normally require reservations, my last one canceled so I have time for you lovely ladies.  What is it you wish of me?  I can read your palms, scry in my crystal ball, lay out the cards, though I do not step into the spirit world to contact loved ones passed on."

Taking a seat across from us, she watched and waited.  I didn't know what to do.  Hell, this was Maeve's idea, not mine.

"Palm reading sounds like fun," Maeve grinned, sticking her hand out across the table and laying it palm upward.

"Cross my palm with gold and I shall tell you what I see," Nicoleta smiled.  

I couldn't help it.  I laughed at the cheesy, overused gypsy line.  

"Shush," Maeve elbowed me in the side.

"Hmm, as your right hand was the hand you used to reach toward me, I'm going to have to say that it is your dominant hand.  It speaks of your life, what you make of it, what your plans are.  It reflects who you are, and who you will become."

Nicoleta studied the palm of the woman, the fingers, gently checking for flexibility.  Running her fingers over the lines in the hand, she pursed her lips, as if deep in thought.

"Yours is a fire hand.  You are often in high spirits, your energy leading to creative pursuits, strong ambitions, as well as a bit of a short temper.  Your heart line, which is this one right here," she paused to trace the line for Maeve's benefit, "tells me that when you love, you love deeply, though I believe it may be a rocky path you tread with your intended.  You also draw on your emotions to be who you are.  These little chains here show that you are definitely one who lives a creative lifestyle… perhaps an artist of some type?"

"She's probably gone to one of your shows at the Hanged Man," I muttered under my breath, receiving a kick to the shins and a glare from Maeve.

"Ahh, such cynicism in your friend, I see.  Alas, but I do not have much time on my hands to visit shows, not with the travel I must undertake from time to time.  But, we shall get back to the reading, shall we not?" she laughed softly, taking up Maeve's hand once more.

As we watched Nicoleta study the palm again, almost as if she had forgotten where she left off, her eyes clouded over and went blank.  

"Hellooooo, is anybody at home?" I asked, waving my hand in front of the woman's face.

"Ash!"

"What?"

"If you ladies will excuse me a moment?  I think I might have something the two of you may need," Nicoleta stated, a grin quivering her lips, as she looked at the two of us.  Standing, she virtually sashayed out of the room and into the back.

"You're being rude.  I swear, sometimes you act like Fenris when it comes to stuff that isn't 'normal'.  We're here to have fun.  I don't care if she's telling the truth or not."

"Yeah, you're right.  It's just that some of it is just soooo corny, y'know?  I mean, c'mon, a rocky path with your boyfriend?  All relationships have problems from time to time."

"That's part of the fun, though," Maeve grinned at me.

"Ahh, I think I have what the two of you require," Nicoleta stated as she approached the table once more.  I looked over at the woman as I saw Maeve stare, her mouth open in a small O.  The next thing I knew, the psychic was setting a bottle of industrial strength cleaner and a sponge in front of Maeve and a bottle with the word brain hand written above the pre-printed word of bleach.

"My dear, if you and your man continue with your antics, as it were, only the best cleaner will do to make sure others can eat off of your tables.  As for your friend here, I believe she still cannot unsee what she had seen when she walked in on the two of you.  Perhaps this solution will help," the gypsy woman said, a note of laughter in her voice.

"God, is there anywhere I can go where I won't be haunted by what you and Anders did in your kitchen?" I moaned, holding my head in my hands.

Maeve screeched with laughter, falling out of her chair and onto the floor with her fit.  She pounded on the carpet a few times, giggling so hard I swear I felt the building vibrating under my feet.  After a few minutes, she finally calmed down and began sucking in deep breaths of air.  Looking over at me, she buried her face into the seat cushion, her shoulders shaking all over again.

"It wasn't that funny!  I swear I'm still scarred!"

"Yes it was.  It's still funny," she said through her laughter.  I sighed, pained, at the turn of events.  If this kept up, the whole of Kirkwall would know what those two did in their kitchen and I wouldn't be able to get away from it.

"Madame Nicoleta, what do we owe you for this?  I'd like to get my friend home before she laughs the building down around us."

"For this?  Free of charge.  It is so rare I get a laugh like this of my own," the woman grinned at me.  Andraste's tits, why can't we ever go anywhere nice?  Well at least nice insofar as not being bombarded by memories of almost kitchen sex.

"Maeve, let's go."

"It was nice meeting you, Nicoleta!" she called out as I dragged her through the door.

As the door shut behind us, the chime that rang out made me smile a bit with relief.  I had to admit to myself that it was fun, even if I ended up the butt of the joke… again.

"You know who she reminds me of?" Maeve asked, slipping her arm through mine, now that she had regained control of herself.

"Who?"

"Varric," she grinned, looking at me with this odd look, as if she wanted to play… oh saints no… Matchmaker!

"Oh dear GOD, Maeve!" I groaned, pulling out of her grip as I walked to the other side of the car.

"What?!" she cried.  "I think they'd be perfect together, don't you?"

"Just get in the damned car," I said, laughing.

"Only if you promise me we can come back in the morning to look at the shiny," she said, looking at me with the perfect set of 'you stole my kitten' eyes.  I swear, in that moment, I knew she belonged to Anders.  He taught her that look.

"Fine, now get in, will you?  I'm freezing my ass off and Fenris likes my ass the way it is, thank you very much!"

*****

"Oh it looks so cuuuute!  It's even prettier in daylight," Maeve gushed over the bracelet through the store window before dragging me inside.  I have to admit, Madame Nicoleta wasn't kidding about the high energy thing.  Some days Maeve could put a chipmunk to shame with how she bounds around.

"May I help you ladies?"

That voice… it sounded so familiar, yet different.  Turning around, I stared.  Maeve gaped.  The woman was short, perhaps five feet in height, straight black hair pulled back from her face into a long ponytail, and her face was devoid of make-up.  Skinny jeans tucked into a knee high pair of black suede moccasins was rounded out by a Kirkwall University hoodie.

"Holy shit, it's…"

"Siobhann Dimitru, at your service," she grinned, giving a half curtsey.  "Otherwise known as Madame Nicoleta.  You forgot the cleaner and bleach, by the way.  If you'd like, I could run next door and grab it for you."

I groaned and smacked my face with the palm of my hand.  Today was going to be a loooooong day.